it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize