I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
Randomize
