yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
i got us a cheese tray and a bottle of whiskey
ugh yes i love our date nights
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
I tried to force my roommate into a sink last night. And I almost won.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
Randomize
