so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize