either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
We interrupt your regularly scheduled Saturday morning programming with this important announcement: you are not the father. I repeat not the father. Congratulations and have a nice day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
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