Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I think I'm done drinking. How did we end up partying at a frat house with my mom...
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
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