do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
birth control should be required to get into college
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
FUCKIN BIRDS ARE CHIRPING AT 4 IN THE MORNING. THE SUN ISN'T RISING YET MOTHERFUCKERS, GO BACK TO YOUR NESTS.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
The salt made it so good this margarita is touching my soul. I swear I'm not high BUT I want elote in a cup with the insides of a shrimp taco. I think that would make my life complete.
Randomize
