doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
My brother just put in eyedrops to talk to my mom on the phone
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
