this beer tastes like vomit already
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
I really hope that wasn't actually his first time. Because if my first time was anything like that I would NEVER have sex again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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