We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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