Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Some one left their pants in the elevator.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Randomize
