Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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