Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
he was CRYING into my vagina
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
