i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i woke up in his bed to a "teach your baby to read" infomercial. i pray to GOD that's not a sign
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
He bought the 12 pack of condoms. I take that as a sign of serious commitment.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
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