his penis was crooked so i rode him at an angle. he seemed used to this.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I'm really not interested in hearing from him. Unless there is casual sex involved
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
Randomize
