doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Standing on the street at 6am in Hong Kong drinking beer. Watching all the hookers do the walk of shame from our hotel. How did I get here? Maybe all my bad choices in my life were really good ones?
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Randomize
