Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He was sweet. He even warned me that his dick curved, and I quote, "more than a banana."
I was chocking and even did the sign for it..And you continued to just laugh
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Randomize
