i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Please come collect your inebriated significant other. He just sleep-farted and scared my cats. Please hurry.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
I broke a rule
Which One?!
The one where I shouldn't sleep with your friends. I broke this particular rule 4 times.
You're officially the worst brother ever.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
