I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
Wake up. Smoke. Masturbate while eggos cook. Go back to bed. Smoke. Body spray shower. Beer with breakfast. Class. Morning of a champion.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
