I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
He made me cum so much, I almost let him spend the night. The operative word being "almost".
I'm at the bar and they've turned up lady gaga to cover the sound of the fire alarm.
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
fucked him on the porch to avoid the chanting that always happens when we leave the bedroom. backfired when a group of freshman walked by and started screaming like fucking babies.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
Randomize
