I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
Well on a lighter note, I had sex in a food truck.
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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