the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
Random fact of the day: cum is a really good eye makeup remover
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize
