Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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