Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
Randomize
