You can't motorboat a personality
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
That was the most spiritually awakened shit I have ever taken.
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