with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I just put on my hot pinky lace thong... you know what that means! ;)
Oh god. Slutty you is on the run. Someone needs to alert the city.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Not sure she's stomping around my apartment muttering incoherently about wanting to speak to the colonel
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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