porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
He came home at 2 AM on roller skates with his hair dyed pink while singing "Sweet Transvestite" and throwing glitter on all of us and everything we own. We had to call a cleaning guy.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Randomize