and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
He made me chicken tenders and margaritas in preparation for me to take a pregnancy test at his place later tonight. Like...seriously.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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