I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
I HAVENT HAD A NICE A NICE DICK SINCE FEBRUARY!! I WANNA KEEP THIS ONE!!!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
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