I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
Apparently I joined a band last night. Definitely my favorite blackout.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Driving home this morning in my minion costume makes me rethink the 0 tint on my windows.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
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