I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
ive come to realize my hair is a lot like my vagina. i put a bunch of shit in it with no result
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's such a gentleman. He didn't even ask why my bra was flung on the seat of my car. He just took my snow brush, pushed it onto the floor and said, "Let's go I'm hungry."
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
We built a fire and had sex in the kiddie pool. Then he washed my hair
Strong work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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