This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
