youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
heather?
this is jacob
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
So I'm probably the first guy in history to tap out of a blowjob.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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