Well douche your snatch and let's go!
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
He brought me bullshit flowers and a bullshit apology. Even shrek did more than that for Fiona. And he's an ogre. Does this not say anything about him?
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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