You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
im six kinds of drunk right now
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
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