yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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