it wasn't lemon gatorade
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Doing 9 month old dishes in my bath tub. These dishes literally had enough time to gestate a human child
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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