That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
If I die write a nice eulogy and bury me with my star wars bobbleheads
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
Randomize
