since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize
