Sometimes I feel like I shouldn't drink when I come out of a black out half naked covered in puke. Then I realize thats why I drink.
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
