Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
please come you make the beer taste better
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
last night was the icing on my 3 week vodka binge cake
I love college. Only here at ten in the morning can you hear "Man, hot sauce on my pussy was my worst idea in a long time." while walking down the hall.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
