your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
I can officially say I had a blunt rolled on my ass
I just put vagisil on my bug bites how do you think my morning is going
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
Randomize
