If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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