help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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