this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Bar. Show boob. Just one. Free drinks. Instant friends
Guys only need one. Little known secret. You're welcome.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
He told me he would make me come so hard I would throw up. I'm actually horrified that he thinks that's something any person would want
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