what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
If you don't sing 'dust in the wind' at my funeral, I'll haunt you forever
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
