if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
apparently 9 shots of absynthe does not take away your skill to walk. i just woke up under a tree in some field on the other side of town with 4 hours missing.
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
and he said i stripped him down, hand cuffed him to his bed post, and tickled his arm pits, and then continued to watch The Hangover.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
I got drunk off three vodka cranberry’s and told him to “WWE raw dog me.” Fucking kill me.
Randomize
