yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
Definitely just poured my beer into a McDonald's cup so I could walk through Walmart without judgment. 'Murica.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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