i was rollin on her like bob the builder
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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