I love black thongs
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Definitely just put my car on cruise control so I could stick my head out of the sunroof while driving to taco bell.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
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