Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
Randomize
